EP 192: Healing A Broken Heart: Christ Centered Healing of Trauma: Norm Wielsch: Part One

Diana WinklerDomestic Violence

We have Norm Wielsch from Episode 35 back on the show this week, promoting his new book: Healing A Broken Heart: Christ Centered Healing of Trauma. Be sure to go back to listen to his story if you haven’t already. He talks candidly about having PTSD as a police officer. He then was diagnosed with an incurable, debilitating neuromuscular disease, having over 25 surgeries in 10 years. He was abusing the opioids to relieve the negative emotions of PTSD. On top of that, his daughter was diagnosed with liver tumors. This placed him in a downward spiral that led him to make some very poor decisions that led to a 14 year prison sentence.

Find out how he is doing today with his health, his family, and his new career in counseling. Hear how he is now helping others to heal who are struggling with abuse, trauma, PTSD, and addictions. We had an enjoyable and encouraging conversation filled with hope! Don’t miss it.

Connect with Norm and buy his new book on his website:

https://www.christ-centeredhealing.com/

Norm Wielsch was a law enforcement officer for over 25 years. Sixteen of those as an undercover narcotic agent. He has experienced many traumatic incidents during his career. In 1998 he was diagnosed with an incurable neuro-muscular disease that caused the loss of feeling, mobility, and strength in his hands and feet. After over 30 surgeries he became addicted to opioids.

He was diagnosed with PTSD. Then his daughter was diagnosed with a serious illness with a poor prognosis. Due to his poor coping mechanisms that are against God’s moral standards, Norm made a series of poor decisions that landed him in federal prison with a 14 year sentence.

It was during this most intense trial of his life, with the reality that he was going to go to prison for a long time, that he answered God’s calling. Norm had been an agnostic all of his life, but he knew that God was calling him to minister to those people who were suffering from trauma, especially first responders. 

While in prison, he obtained a Master’s Degree in Theology & Counseling, a Doctorate in Christian Counseling, and a California Drug and Alcohol Counseling Certificate. He is currently working at a Men’s Residential Treatment facility as a Registered Alcohol and drug Counselor and Pastoral   Care Chaplain.

While in prison, Norm counseled many inmates with a variety of issues, preached God’s word in the chapel, taught Christian classes, and led bible studies.

Norm often speaks to those who are suffering from traumatic experiences  including churches and addiction ministries.

Norm has a Master’s Degree in Law Enforcement Management. He achieved the rank of commander prior to his arrest and has over ten commendations for outstanding service. Norm Wielsch is an expert in law enforcement tactics including: narcotic, enforcement, addictions and influence, criminal investigations, traffic collisions, pursuit driving, high risk search warrant service, report writing, PTSD, and the police culture.

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Transcript Norm Wielsch Part One

[00:00:00] Welcome to the Wounds of the Faithful podcast, brought to you by DSW Ministries. Your host is singer, songwriter, speaker, and domestic violence advocate, Diana Winkler. She is passionate about helping survivors in the church heal from domestic violence and abuse and trauma. This podcast is not a substitute for professional counseling or qualified medical help.

[00:00:24] Now, here is Diana.

[00:00:31] Hello everyone. Come on in.

[00:00:34] We’ve got a great show for you today. As always, I’m really excited because I have another repeat guest come back on the show. Norm Wielsch was on my first season on episode 35. He was a police officer.

[00:00:53] I invited him back on the show because last time when he was here, [00:01:00] he did not have his book yet. So I found out that he finally got his book released and so I invited him back on the show. He was a great guest and I know that you’re going to enjoy catching up with him and seeing what he’s been doing in the last three years and how his life has been.

[00:01:22] So I do want to ask you to listen to episode 35 first. because I’m not going to have him completely repeat his story but it was a really excellent interview. Lots of truths and valuable information. So let me read his bio just as a reminder for those that haven’t met him yet. He says, I was an agnostic police officer for over 25 years.

[00:01:50] I was exposed to many traumatic incidents. I was diagnosed with PTSD. Then I was diagnosed with an incurable, [00:02:00] debilitating neuromuscular disease. I had over 25 surgeries in 10 years. I was prescribed opioids for the pain. I soon began to abuse the opioids to relieve the negative emotions of PTSD. Then my daughter was diagnosed with liver tumors.

[00:02:20] This placed me in a downward spiral that led me to make some very poor decisions that led me to a 14 year prison sentence. Through divine intervention, my daughter and I were healed. I spent over eight years in federal prison where I taught how God heals PTSD. In prison, I obtained a master’s degree in theology and counseling, then a doctorate in Christian counseling.

[00:02:53] I went on to become a registered addiction counselor, and I’m in the process of becoming a [00:03:00] chaplain with the Assemblies of God Church. If you allow him to do so, God will change your mistakes and traumatic events into good. I am a great example of God’s love. So his new book is called Healing a Broken Heart, Christ Centered Healing of Trauma.

[00:03:22] And this comes with a study guide.

[00:03:24] So, I’m excited to get caught up with Norm Vilsch. Enjoy the conversation.

[00:03:32] All right. I’m so excited to have back on the show for the second time. Norm Vilsch, welcome back. Well, You even got my pronunciation of the last name. Right. Nice. Yes, I did that the first time too. Oh, I’m glad to be here. It’s been a long time. Nice to see you. Yes, I so enjoyed having you on the first time and I know that was three years ago and I really wanted [00:04:00] the listeners to hear, how are you doing now?

[00:04:03] You went through so much the first time you were on the show and I found out about your new book finally being, released and oh, I definitely have to find out about the new book. And so, we’re doing things a little bit different today. We’re catching up with you here. So start us out.

[00:04:24] Yeah, last time you were on house arrest. I was on home confinement, so I was limited to a lot of stuff, but it allowed me to have the time to, to get my book done and to the publisher. I did a lot of studying in the Bible and I ended up getting a job at a addiction clinic. where I began my now career as a men’s addiction recovery counselor.

[00:04:49] And I also went and became a corporate chaplain. So I go to businesses that hire my company that I work for, which is Marketplace Chaplains. And we go [00:05:00] to businesses and serve people where they’re at work. So it’s been a busy few years. Yeah, I think you found your calling with all the stuff that you had gone through. We primarily talked about the PTSD for first responders and stuff that, is a reality and your health that you suffered from.

[00:05:26] So let’s talk about how is your health doing these days? You had so many surgeries on your hands and stuff, right? Well, during the last four years, I had another three. I just actually I’m one month out from my last hand surgery. I don’t know if you could see it, but yeah. It’s if they’re all kind of screwed up and what’s happening is that the hands are curled.

[00:05:52] The fingers are curling It’s a neuromuscular disease So the left hand was curling so bad that I [00:06:00] couldn’t even use it. I couldn’t grab anything I mean, it’s been years and years since I’ve been able to button a button or zipper But so what the doctors are trying to do is they’re trying to fix it.

[00:06:11] The problem is that this, like only about 110, 000 people in the country have this disease. So the doctors don’t really know about it too much. And so they’re trying different things with the help of Stanford Medical Center is kind of leading them along. So I’m only a month out. So I don’t know how this is going to end up.

[00:06:31] I’m hoping and praying that it comes out at least usable. And then in between those hand surgeries, I had another foot surgery. Basically they’re, they just had to take a toe. So they took one of my big toes and yeah, so it’s an ongoing, thing but it could be a lot worse.

[00:06:49] Right. Where I work, there’s a couple of guys that have cancer and they have, liver issues. So I’ve learned that. I’m not the only one suffering with things going on. Right. And [00:07:00] there’s people that are always worse off than us. And we got to be very thankful for what we do have and the blessings that we do have.

[00:07:08] It’s hard sometimes, but I try to stay in that frame of mind. Well, you have to, otherwise, you kind of lose it with thinking negative thoughts all the time. Our bodies feel that, absorb those thoughts and respond in that manner, yeah. When it starts going, I don’t want to say going wrong, but when there seems to be no progress, yeah.

[00:07:31] My mind still can go to dark places. But I’ve since learned through the last 20 years of this disease that I can change my thought patterns, and that’s what I’m trying to do. It works most of the time, but every once in a while it’s like, gosh darn it, can’t I just catch a break? But again, we have to just be thankful for what I got.

[00:07:53] I’ve got wonderful children, healthy children. I’ve got healthy grandchildren. I’ve got a wonderful wife that helps me [00:08:00] through everything. So those are the blessings. It could be a lot worse. I could be homeless and really suffering. So, so praise God. I’ve been stalling to do my right hand because I’m right handed. And I don’t want to make the right hand worse so that I can’t even take care of myself.

[00:08:15] So once they get the left hand straightened out hopefully they will do it sometime will. So I I remember that you had an addiction to pain pills. So. What’s the status on dealing with the pain, which I’m sure you still have, right?

[00:08:32] You see, that’s the thing. I have no pain and that’s just kept feeding me the pills because of all the surgeries. So this hand surgery the last answer, I think we’re on 42 surgeries now. But they don’t, I tell them I don’t want any pills anymore. They give me a special shot that like numbs the area. The pills were to basically numb my emotions for the PTSD.

[00:08:53] But. During the years in prison, I was able to resolve all those [00:09:00] issues. And that’s why I ended up writing this book is because I was actually in secular counseling for almost four years. And not that secular counseling isn’t good. Secular counseling is awesome. They basically saved my life by teaching me coping skills.

[00:09:14] But during those four years, I saw a psychiatrist and therapist, even a specialist in police, trauma. There was no healing, right? They just teach you how to cope with these things. So when I got to prison, and there was seminary classes going on there on Christian counseling, I started taking those.

[00:09:34] And that’s how I got my master’s degree in theology and counseling, is I took that. And through those classes, it made me study the Bible more on healing. And I found what the Bible says about healing. And I, after the studies were done and my doctoral thesis was the book, basically, So since I did the program in the book, I haven’t had a negative emotion from [00:10:00] PTSD in like over 12 years.

[00:10:03] I’ve been clean for 13 years now. So, yeah, it’s just faith in God and being in a relationship with him has just changed my life totally. It’s made me a different person. And now you can really help the first responders, the police and firemen and ambulance EMTs that are going through this PTSD.

[00:10:27] Do you have a story on somebody that you’ve helped with your newfound newfound career there? Well, there’s been several. It’s hard to break into that law enforcement or first responder culture, right? Because they consider me now criminal. So I really can’t get in there, but through the church, like, I hold classes on healing trauma.

[00:10:54] And we have been able to make significant progress on some women that have been [00:11:00] abused during the relationships, abused by their parents or father, sexual and physical abuse by going through this process and, it’s not me. I’m just pointing out the scriptures in the Bible and how to apply them to your life, and so those have been kind of my most proudest moments, right? Because I still have a lot of shame because I was a cop and I stole drugs out of the evidence and gave it to somebody. So I still have that, that, that shame, which, but helping others is really helping me with dealing with that shame.

[00:11:33] And it also helps keep me sober, right? If you go AA, part of AA is service. And that service, it just, it warms your heart. It just makes you feel better. And I don’t think you can be angry if you’re serving people. But, yeah, a lot of women, and I just, I don’t understand why, but a lot of women have been abused.

[00:11:53] They stay in this oppressed state because they really don’t know how to get themselves out of it. Right. [00:12:00] And and I know you’re doing the same thing. It’s a wonderful thing that you’re doing. I just wish that more women would come forward. Right. It’s still that little dirty secret.

[00:12:11] And even when I was working as a cop, the women would call their, I’d go to the house and their, the husband, we got black eyes and everything. I’d try to arrest the guy. They would jump on me and try to beat me up. Don’t take him, don’t take him. And I didn’t understand that, but now I get the psychology behind it, right?

[00:12:27] So I think that should be more taught in public so people understand. Because it is a sad thing that women have to suffer with these abuses throughout their entire lives. I think that it’s more getting out there than it used to be. Like in the 70s, 80s when I grew up. You didn’t talk about abuse, it was Hidden, like you say now, I think with church too, and unfortunately the preachers that are getting [00:13:00] exposed as pedophiles and these gross churches.

[00:13:04] Who are allowing, youth pastors to sexually abuse children and then, women who are forced to stay in marriages to abusive men telling them that they can’t get a divorce because God’s going to be mad at them if they do, or it’s a horrible sin that’s going to send them to hell. When that is not what God meant For marriage between two Christians.

[00:13:30] That doesn’t glorify God for a woman to be a punching bag to a man. You’re exactly right. And those pastors are causing more damage than not. Right. So you’ll see a the churches the attendance, the churches is really diminishing. And I think these are some of the reasons why is they don’t stake up with the times.

[00:13:47] They don’t want to bring out. into the air, into the light, all these things that are happening, but I think it’s necessary to do that because you can’t heal if you’re, compartmentalizing everything and not working on [00:14:00] resolving these issues. Now, let’s walk through your book a little bit, Healing a Broken Heart.

[00:14:06] I love that. Christ centered healing of trauma. And what’s different about yours is you have a study guide that goes with it. What’s that all about? Well, I wrote that with the intent of Having small groups do these things in every church, right?

[00:14:22] Every group, every church usually has a program of small groups getting together and because almost everyone, not everyone, but almost everyone has suffered some kind of traumatic event in their lives. And most of those people were like, we’re not taught how to deal emotionally with these things.

[00:14:39] I know I wasn’t, and I allowed it to really get to the point where I’m taking pills in order to. To numb my emotions, I believe this stuff, not necessarily a Christ centered approach, but at least dealing with your emotions, and managing your emotions should be taught in schools, from elementary school up, So, so we don’t know how [00:15:00] to do that.

[00:15:00] We don’t know how to come forward and that there’s still a stigma of being weak, asking for help to sign a weakness, especially for men. But I know a lot of women do the same thing and they’re afraid to, that people will point at them all, you’re mentally ill, you’re mentally ill. No, it’s everybody has been through this.

[00:15:18] Some have better resilience than others. I know that I’ve worked with a lot of people who’ve experienced the same things and they have no, no problems. And I, my resilience, I guess was lower and it affected me really poorly. But so I envisioned small groups to do this themselves, right? So if you get the small group guide, it kind of, you get the book, you read, it tells you to read a chapter and then the group gets together.

[00:15:45] They talk about it. And then they do something positive. So it’s like, well, okay, what can you do for someone today? Can you call a friend that you haven’t been? Okay. And the next week maybe is on forgiveness. Hey, call somebody that you really, need to forgive or ask for forgiveness from.[00:16:00][00:16:00] So, so that’s the intention of the small group guide. But what I’m, what I wanted to point out in this book is we go through explaining trauma, You know what it actually is and the physiological aspects of trauma on your body, right? Because a lot of us got backaches and headaches and all these things.

[00:16:19] And it’s really could be the trauma, right? Because you’re holding it into your body. It’s somatic. And in other words, your body is just holding onto it. And then we go into why we should believe the Bible. So I was basically agnostic until after Jesus got ahold of me after my arrest. I knew something was there, but I really didn’t believe in God, right?

[00:16:40] And the reason I didn’t believe in God was this world is so evil. If there was a kind, loving God, why does he allow this stuff to happen? So that was my sticking point. And so I wanted to do a, so there’s two chapters in there that are basically a Bible study. I go through the, the forgiveness [00:17:00] process.

[00:17:00] I go through the way, the reason why Jesus is here, what He is, the reason why He, all the things that He did and why He did them in my interpretation of it. And I try to explain it in simple terms an eighth grader can understand. Because when I started reading the Bible, I didn’t understand a I need someone to help me and then I could even go into, the creationism and stuff.

[00:17:26] Why it’s. It’s more, it requires more faith to believe in Darwinism than it does to believe that God created everything. And, but just little tidbits, it’s not like a deep dive into it. It’s an overview, and I think if you read that, and understand it in simple terms, it makes the Bible easier to digest.

[00:17:46] And when you understand what God’s true purpose was, His love for us, and why He sent a Savior for us. It makes it easier to believe. And if it’s, if you believe in a God and trust in a [00:18:00] God, it’s much, much easier to go through this process because it’s only God created us. It’s only God that can heal us. I think things about my podcast over maybe somebody else’s is that I recognize that people reject God after they’ve experienced abuse.

[00:18:19] And they want to throw God out with the bathwater, right? And I started this podcast to help people heal those that want to Reconnect with God, want to keep that relationship with God, or maybe just find out who God really is. Who is Jesus really? Not the version that the abusive churches have been shoving down their throat, but who Jesus, the compassionate and empathetic Jesus is, that treats women well, and gives them value.

[00:18:53] So that I think you and me are on the same on the same plane, have the same purpose [00:19:00] there.

[00:19:00] . No you’re exactly right. And what I get a lot as well, God is there to punish you when you do something wrong.

[00:19:05] And that’s not the case. And. There’s, I, there’s so many rules. I don’t want to follow all these rules. Well, Jesus talks about, there’s only two rules, right? Love God and love everyone else. Because if I love you, I can’t steal from you. I can’t lie about you. I can’t gossip about you.

[00:19:22] I can’t cheat on you. That’s all it comes down to. And when people see that and they say, well, I said, it’s so simple, right? But I didn’t learn about that either. Oh, if you don’t go to church, you’re going to go to hell. Love it. That’s nothing to do with going to church, it’s your relationship.

[00:19:37] So. A lot of people do not present the gospel correctly, even pastors, and it saddens me. It really does. Absolutely. And I think what you’re teaching with your book and your study guide is very similar to what we do with Mending the Soul. It’s maybe a little more formalized than most people are used to, [00:20:00] but really seeing a visible difference.

[00:20:03] And I’m sure that you have as well. You have any examples of the difference that’s made in some folks lives? I, well, I can’t mention, obviously names, but there was this gentleman, he was a police officer. And he was married. He was married for a long time, I think 20 years or so.

[00:20:22] And he, his wife ended up cheating on him. And so when that happened, he divorced her and she ended up, California is a 50, 50 state. So she took half of his retirement, half of the house, that half of everything. Right. And he should have understood that. We all know that California is 50, 50, but he.

[00:20:43] So much anger and so much resentment towards her for cheating on him. And then for taking everything from him and taking the kids. He did, he still had 50, 50 custody, but anyway, men and women they build up these things in their mind, especially during [00:21:00] divorces. And that’s one of the things I try to explain the book is too, is that A lot of people just think trauma is like a military thing or women being abused, but no, it could be a traffic accident.

[00:21:10] I have one guy that’s debilitated his whole life because he had a dog bite when he was young, it’s just these things. So the way in the Bible, there’s a lot of principles to follow. Well, not a lot, but so judgment. So Jesus says, if you judge others, God’s going to judge you. There’s forgiveness.

[00:21:32] If you don’t forgive others, God’s not going to forgive you. That’s plain as day, right? Plain as day. And and there’s other psychological things that go hand in hand with it. Often when we try to avoid future traumatic events from happening, such as a child abuse or even marriage abuse, we make this promise to ourselves, well, I’m never going to allow anybody to get close to me again.

[00:21:57] And so he made this promise to [00:22:00] himself that all women are gold diggers, all women are cheaters. And I’m never going to have another, I’m never going to get married again. I’m just going to date. But what happens is, these promises become self fulfilling prophecies, right, where eventually you talk yourself into it, and that becomes a wall, and then you’re not open to other relationships.

[00:22:21] So this was one of his biggest problems. So when he came to see me, It was, well, I always seem to implode my relationships, I think I’m doing good. I like this person. And all of a sudden, I blow up something into a big, from a molehill to a big mountain, almost pushing her away. And so when we go further into it, we found out that he made this promise.

[00:22:47] Right. So, so first of all, he never forgave his ex wife. So he still had all this resentment. He judged her as, I probably shouldn’t say the term, but she’s judged her as a slut. Right. And that’s not true. Relationships break up and I’m sure there’s [00:23:00] more to it than, he’s even telling me.

[00:23:02] But you still, you have to forgive, right? Jesus says so, you gotta forgive. So he was holding all this in and it was the inner turmoil was just blocking every, his blocking his healing and also blocking the interest of other people, right? Because he was so angry and bitter that very few people wanted to be around him.

[00:23:24] So when we got to the point where we realized that he had made these promises, But when this is all explained in the book, too, that, he had to renounce the promises. So these are called inner vows. You renounce that inner vow and say, God I’m sorry for making this inner vow. And I ask you now to break this vow.

[00:23:43] And then, in the heart, he doesn’t have to go to his ex wife and say, I’m sorry, for it, but he has to release it to God. Right. God, I’ve been holding in this resentment towards my ex wife. Please forgive me for my unforgiveness. Please forgive me for my [00:24:00] judgment of her for being something that she’s not.

[00:24:03] Because , the book is like a spiritual cleansing, right? Because like when we come to Jesus he forgives us our sins, past, present, and future. But the next day, if you go out and do something stupid or bad, that, and you don’t confess it, then it’s un unrepentant sin.

[00:24:23] Unrepentant sin causes God to turn away from you. The Bible says, your sin has set me apart from you. And in Psalms, it says, God doesn’t hear your prayers when you have unrepentant sin. So, so this shows you, these are the block, these are the things that block our healing. Once he started to let all that stuff go.

[00:24:40] Now it wasn’t an instantaneous thing. It took several months for him to work on this, but when he realized what he was doing is he was sabotaging his relationships, on his own because of these things in the back of his mind, he finally met somebody and now he’s he got a great relationship and his ex wife and him could go [00:25:00] to the kids.

[00:25:01] I don’t know, baseball games, whatever it may be. So I think that’s one of the success stories because, this guy had hated her so much. He was every day, he was trying to figure out revenge and all this stuff. That’s how people are. Right. Our default setting is self interest.

[00:25:18] Right? So how does this affect me? Where the interest should be, well, how is this divorce going to affect the children?

[00:25:24] I think this is a great time to pause here. I know you want to hear the rest of what Norm is up to and his ministry. So be sure to come back next time on the Wounds. of the Faithful Podcast. God bless you and bye for now.

[00:25:43] Thank you for listening to the Wounds of the Faithful podcast. If this episode has been helpful to you, please hit the subscribe button and tell a friend. You can connect with us at DSWMinistries. org, where you’ll find our blog along [00:26:00] with our Facebook, Twitter, and our YouTube channel links. Hope to see you next week!