EP 144: What Is Deconstruction? Part One

Diana WinklerChristianity

We’re talking about deconstruction, what it is and why survivors choose to go down that road. We discuss many reasons that people give for abandoning their faith or turning their backs on God altogether. We’ll be exploring in a non judgmental, compassionate way, so join me for an encouraging episode. This is Part One of a Two Part series.

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Deconstruction Part One

[00:00:00] [00:00:33] Diana: hello everybody! Summer time and the living is easy. Not so easy here in Arizona. You may have heard on the news about the extreme heat, and yes, Arizona is one of them for two weeks now. Now it does get to 119 every year, [00:01:00] sometimes 120. Probably the highest ever, let’s see when I was in high school it was 122 degrees, and that has not been the highest record. If you go to Death Valley or Lake Havasu we’ve got they get into 130 degrees.

[00:01:25] Diana: Staying inside in the air conditioning, going to the neighbor’s pool. And I have to get up very early in the morning to do the yard work. So, speaking of yard work, we have what’s called in Arizona, monsoon season. That’s pretty much our tropical storm season. And you don’t think that Arizona has humidity?

[00:01:51] Diana: This is when we have humidity. Is during our tropical storm season. And we just had a [00:02:00] huge storm on Wednesday and looking out the window it was like watching a hurricane. I kid you not, it was raining, the wind was so strong I wasn’t sure about my trees. The next morning we had a couple power outages but the power came on when I was getting ready for work.

[00:02:24] Diana: Thankfully. And we had a bent flagpole in our front yard. I think that was the worst that we had. A lot of stuff was all over the backyard. We had to pick up. But we got off easy.

[00:02:42] Diana: My neighbor who I go swimming with. Who has fed me during my hospitalization, recovery. Her entire east wall is gone. And she isn’t the only one. There’s [00:03:00] countless people along the main road here that lost their back wall that faces the street. And there’s some retention ponds also that have huge eucalyptus trees and they fell.

[00:03:17] Diana: And I was thankful that these trees did not fall on anybody’s houses. So we are playing cleanup and I may have mentioned my cat Meow Meow that we have been taking care of. She’s a feral cat, and she has taken a liking to us and we’ve developed a relationship with her for the past year or so.

[00:03:44] Diana: So we’ve been slowly getting her things to make her more comfortable on her front porch. But when the 119 degree hit. I felt really bad because she was laying on the front porch, and she was [00:04:00] panting pretty hard. I told my husband, I said, you know, I don’t want to go out there and find a dead cat.

[00:04:05] Diana: So I asked Brian, I said, you know, you don’t go into my workout room.

[00:04:08] Diana: I can put her in there and shut the door and see if that would make it better. So I put her in my workout room with all my exercise equipment. And she was confused. She didn’t know what was going on or where she was.

[00:04:25] Diana: But now she really likes it in the house. We let her back outside when it gets dark out. Then we bring her in lunchtime when it gets too hot. She seems to really like being inside because we have tile floors and it’s quite cool to lay on.

[00:04:43] Diana: We bought that and we bought her some toys. But for the most part, she hides in the closet.

[00:04:50] Diana: So yeah, we now have an official cat.

[00:04:55] Diana: Now we also have been seeing this smoky gray [00:05:00] cat on our back porch when it started getting really hot. And so I decided to feed the cat because it was so miserable out.

[00:05:11] Diana: She’s terrified of humans.

[00:05:13] Diana: But we had a little surprise yesterday.

[00:05:17] Diana: I was cleaning up some of the storm damage on the back porch and I bent over and picking up some stuff and I heard kitten meow, you know what it sounds like. So I thought, where is that coming from? So I get the flashlight, and I’m putting it down where Smokey usually hides, and Sure enough, Smokey was back there, and

[00:05:45] Diana: Oh boy, she has kittens. I’m really glad that I was giving her food. I had no idea she was pregnant. And, can’t imagine having kittens in the middle of this heat and [00:06:00] the storm we just had. That must have been terrible. And so yeah, I’m turning into a cat mama now. Aww.

[00:06:11] Diana: So that’s what’s going on here, I wanted to let you know this announcement that Stitcher A podcast platform is, I guess, going out of business or not doing podcasts anymore.

[00:06:31] Diana: So if you are listening to this on Stitcher, be sure to pick another podcast platform to listen to. Now for my show, I’m pretty much on everything Spotify, iHeartRadio, Pandora, Apple Podcasts. Listen notes, I’m on Amazon, you can also do the Alexa, play the Wounds of the Faithful podcast and [00:07:00] you can listen.

[00:07:02] Diana: So just want to let you know that. I heard that from another podcast. Thank you Jordan Harbinger for that. So I think that is at the end of September, beginning of October, if I’m not mistaken. So, don’t forget that. Plenty of places to listen. So, let’s get into the show today.

[00:07:25] Diana: What are we going to talk about? We’re going to talk about the word deconstruction. Again, this is a buzzword in the advocacy community, if you’re an abuse survivor and you’re on social media you’ll hear this word a lot.

[00:07:44] Diana: And so we’re going to talk about that. We will also go into what reconstruction is. We will probably be doing that. In the next episode, Reconstruction, because I have a lot to [00:08:00] say, but what exactly is deconstruction? That basically means that when you go through trauma, that you decide that you are not going to believe in God anymore.

[00:08:14] Diana: Or you’re not going to go to church anymore. You’re not going to pray anymore. You’re disgusted with. The spiritual,

[00:08:26] Diana: you’re disgusted with religion as a whole, based on what you’ve experienced in your trauma. And that could be any kind of trauma, you know, sexual abuse, verbal, emotional abuse, church abuse. Financial abuse, rape, any kind of abuse. That is very normal to have those feelings that, why [00:09:00] did God let that happen to me?

[00:09:02] Diana: I don’t ever want to go back to church. I don’t want anything to do with God. And that is understandable. I don’t know anybody who hasn’t said that to themselves. It’s like when you break up with somebody and you say to yourself, I’m never going to date another guy ever again, or I’m never going to go out with another woman.

[00:09:27] Diana: I’m never going to get married again. I’m done. You’re saying that out of a place of pain. And I understand that, I said the same thing when I got out of my abusive marriage. I Thought I’m not going to ever marry again because they’re all rotten. And we can believe that all the churches are rotten and all of Christians are rotten and [00:10:00] God is rotten.

[00:10:02] Diana: But Reconstructionism is basically you’ve got a clean slate and you’re going to research and figure out what it is that you believe.

[00:10:19] Diana: I don’t believe this anymore, I believe this, which is healthier. And we’re going to get into that, but that’s a basic definition, and it means different things to different people. So I, as an abuse survivor, somebody that’s come out on the other side I’m just going to give you my view from my experience.

[00:10:48] Diana: I don’t know everything. I don’t have all the answers. But I’m going to be honest with you. If you’ve been listening to this podcast for any length of time You know that [00:11:00] I just give it to you straight. I’m not gonna give you a bunch of fluff I’m not gonna tell you what you want to hear.

[00:11:07] Diana: I’m gonna tell you the truth as I see. It You don’t have to agree with me. You may be in a different place in your healing journey. You may have not even started. You’re still bleeding devastated from your wounds from your trauma. I get that. That’s okay, It’s okay, and we’ll talk about this as we go through some of these points, that Christianity as a whole they have different belief systems.

[00:11:42] Diana: And we’ll get into that. And deconstructionism

[00:11:46] Diana: It might just mean I’m going to leave the denomination that I’m in. That is what happened to me. I left the Fundamental Baptist [00:12:00] community and I was glad that I did, although it was painful and it was an adjustment I had to go find another church, another denomination.

[00:12:14] Diana: We’re going to go through some of these points now. I have been on Twitter, I have been listening to podcasts about different cults and different survivor stories, and they all have a different viewpoint.

[00:12:36] Diana: But I’ve been hearing this, some of the same common denominators of, I don’t want anything to do with religion and God. And so let’s go through some of these.

[00:12:49] Diana: I’ll go through these and give you maybe some different viewpoints for you to choose from. So, the first one I [00:13:00] want to go over is Sin nature. I hear a lot that, I don’t want to be called a sinner. I’ve been told I’m a rotten horrible disgusting sinner, and I deserve hell and

[00:13:18] Diana: I don’t like that. And so I’m going to not believe in God. I’m gonna abandon that I’m a sinner because I don’t like that.

[00:13:29] Diana: Again, it’s about perspective of course if you’ve been beat over the head with, You’re a horrible, rotten sinner, and you’ve never been told about the grace of God. Yeah, that’s terrible. That is a terrible thing to have on your shoulders, that you are a sinner and there’s nothing you can do about it.

[00:13:57] Diana: And some people deny [00:14:00] that there is even sin in this world. So here’s how I see it.

[00:14:07] Diana: There is no way that you can go through this life, especially right now. And not recognize that there is evil in this world. There are evil people in this world that do evil things.

[00:14:28] Diana: You can’t deny that. You can’t put your head in the sand and say that evil doesn’t exist. Because it does.

[00:14:41] Diana: Human beings have the capacity to do some horrible things. And so. Coming from scripture, yes. We are born with a sin nature because [00:15:00] of the fall of man.

[00:15:02] Diana: And whether you believe in Adam and Eve as a literal story, the fall of man was when sin entered into this world. And whether you don’t like the fact that Adam and Eve are the ones that sinned. I shouldn’t be responsible for their sin. Let’s think about that for a minute. Even if we didn’t have a sin nature because of Adam and Eve,

[00:15:29] Diana: You still have a choice whether you sin or not. Have you chosen to sin? Yes, I have chosen to sin. I have chosen to do some terrible things. If you listen long enough to this podcast, you’ll find out what they are. But

[00:15:50] Diana: we are all in the same boat here. We are all sinners. There’s nobody that’s better than anybody else. We are all [00:16:00] on the same plane. And some of us have sin that we prefer to do. We like, or we have a propensity to. And we have a weakness for. Some people, it is illicit sex.

[00:16:25] Diana: For some people, it is gambling. For some others, it’s murder or lust, gluttony,

[00:16:37] Diana: stealing, dishonesty. We all know liars in our lives. We know people that will lie like a rug. Can’t believe a word they say it is our sin nature to gravitate towards Sinful things. [00:17:00] Does that mean we don’t have any control over our actions and our choices? No, it doesn’t. We have control. Also when we Believe in the Lord Jesus and he is our Savior and the Holy Spirit lives inside of us, We have the power to live a victorious life without habitual sin.

[00:17:28] Diana: There’s a difference between, okay, I had an argument with my husband out in the kitchen a few minutes ago. And I say I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that, please forgive me. And that may happen once every few months. That’s a sin. You’re treating your spouse with disrespect, that’s a sin.

[00:17:56] Diana: It’s different when we are in habitual sin, [00:18:00] unrepentant sin. We are out there sleeping around different sex partners, that’s an example

[00:18:11] Diana: that maybe somebody has a weakness for that. That is, according to God’s word, that is a sin. He didn’t intend us to be sleeping around with multiple partners. Now if you repent of that, you stop doing it. Then you are forgiven that. If

[00:18:39] Diana: you had a weak moment during a date with somebody and you had sex, But you regretted it the next day. And you said I’m not gonna do This is not right. And you stop that isn’t habitual sin. That is well, I made a [00:19:00] mistake. What I’m going to correct myself on that and with God’s help we can live a life without habitual sin. Does that mean we’re horrible rotten people?

[00:19:16] Diana: God loves us. God loves us the way we are Whatever you have done whatever mistakes you’ve made God still loves you, warts and all. And I’ve said that on the podcast before And so

[00:19:34] Diana: that’s why I tell you, you need to read the Bible for yourself, because you will see the people in the Bible, they were very flawed human beings. They’ve done some terrible things. And we’ve done podcasts on those stories, but you also read about God’s grace and God using [00:20:00] them even after they’ve done some terrible things.

[00:20:06] Diana: He still loves them. He still wants to bless them. He gives them second, third, fourth, fifth chances. And it’s the same for you. So,

[00:20:20] Diana: you are a child of God. You are loved and cared for. Now, he doesn’t want you to be in continual sin.

[00:20:30] Diana: He doesn’t. But you are his child, and he will take you back with open arms.

[00:20:38] Diana: He will do that. So let’s talk about something else that I’m going to try not to get too doctrinal, or preaching at you today.

[00:20:53] Diana: But let’s talk about the doctrine of hell. This is a big deal for a lot of [00:21:00] people also with the rapture.

[00:21:03] Diana: I’ve heard a lot of stories that. They were raised by Christian parents and they went to a church where fire and brimstone was preached at them constantly. That they were going to go to hell and You know, if they mess up, they’re going to go to hell. If they lose their virginity outside of marriage, they’re going to go to hell.

[00:21:32] Diana: And

[00:21:33] Diana: I’m sorry about that. It’s traumatic for an adult, but more so for a child who takes everything literally. Now, I believe in the doctrine of hell. I believe there is a place called hell. But. There are people that don’t believe in hell. My husband is [00:22:00] one of them.

[00:22:01] Diana: So this is an example of different views in Christianity. My husband believes in what’s called annihilationism, which means you cease to exist instead of you go to either heaven or hell. You don’t exist anymore. You’re obliterated from I guess the timeline. I don’t believe that myself in annihilationism because it doesn’t make a lot of sense when you read the whole of scripture.

[00:22:38] Diana: There are many people that believe in a literal

[00:22:43] Diana: fire hell, where you are burning to death for eternity. Others believe in

[00:22:53] Diana: darkness

[00:22:56] Diana: and others, of course, you’ve heard that they think it’s [00:23:00] going to be a party with their friends. They’re going to live like hell raisers, and so they’re going to go to hell and have this party and have a good time in hell. That’s absurd. Anybody with a lick of sense knows that. You’re a fool if you believe that you’re going to party with your friends. That’s just not logical.

[00:23:22] Diana: And a lot of people believe it’s allegorical. It’s just a teaching tool.

[00:23:30] Diana: But for me, this is how I see hell. And I have changed my viewpoints on this because once I got out of my bubble that I was in, I was taught literal fire, hell, damnation kind of thing. Now,

[00:23:52] Diana: I know that there has to be a place of [00:24:00] punishment for those that are enemies of God, those that have done horrible, unspeakable things. There has to be a place, there has to be punishment.

[00:24:15] Diana: And a lot of people, like my husband doesn’t believe in a hell. God isn’t loving if he sends somebody to a fire and brimstone hell, that’s not loving. What do you think of the death penalty? What do you think of prison? Do you believe that people who are evil in this world deserve to go to prison?

[00:24:39] Diana: Or do you believe in a capital punishment? When you believe in annihilationism, you believe that

[00:24:49] Diana: you just cease to exist. There is no punishment for somebody that’s wicked. Why isn’t it the same here, on this side of [00:25:00] eternity, that if you murder somebody, then you’re gonna go to the firing squad, and your life will be taken. Why don’t you subscribe to that view?

[00:25:12] Diana: You kind of have to think about that your thought process. Yes, we’re to forgive those. People that hurt us. And a popular example is drinking and driving. If a drunk driver killed your kid or another loved one, would you want that person to go to prison? Personally, I, if somebody kills another human being in cold blood, I am for the death penalty.

[00:25:48] Diana: A lot of people don’t agree with me on that.

[00:25:52] Diana: You know, we have overcrowded prisons. Our taxes go to taking care of prisoners when they’re not [00:26:00] going to be rehabilitated.

[00:26:02] Diana: But life in prison? That’s a horrible existence. That’s a punishment. You don’t believe in capital punishment? Life in prison is horrible. That’s why I’m a… A law abiding citizen because the thought of prison is, you know, I would not want that at all. That keeps me from going out and, you know, shooting somebody that cuts me off in traffic or seeking revenge on somebody that’s hurt me really badly because,

[00:26:43] Diana: I don’t want to go to prison. I enjoy my freedom. But with hell, nobody wants to talk about hell. Nobody wants to admit that a loving God would, in justice, [00:27:00] put somebody in hell. They don’t really go together. Oh, we should forgive and let them into heaven instead. Yeah, you have to think about that.

[00:27:15] Diana: Does that really follow logic? And we’ll talk more about that. But for me,

[00:27:24] Diana: what I have studied and what I have decided at this point in my life, this is what hell is to me. It is a separation from God and everything that is holy and good. Even if you didn’t have the fire, being separated from God would be unbearable for me, would be unbearable to be separated from my family that I love, separated from anything that is good in this world.

[00:27:58] Diana: I don’t know [00:28:00] whether there’ll be real fire or not, but I believe that it says hell will be darkness.

[00:28:09] Diana: Darkness would be pretty bad too. No light, the light of this world gone. You’re in darkness With other people that are in darkness. The people wind up in hell as Punishment, they’re down there with others who are being punished.

[00:28:32] Diana: And do I think it’s for eternity? Yes, because I believe God, sees our hearts. God sees If we are repentant or not, God sees if we’ve learned our lesson, if we’re going to repeat it again, if we’re hateful of God. I believe in the [00:29:00] justice of God that he is going to judge rightly.

[00:29:06] Diana: I would be very surprised to be on the other side of eternity in heaven and Adolf Hitler being there. Or Joseph Stalin being there. That to me, if the justice was up to me, those kinds of people would not be there. Do I know those people’s hearts? No, I don’t.

[00:29:34] Diana: They committed extermination of people group, several people groups. In fact, they tried to exterminate.

[00:29:44] Diana: So I do believe it’s for eternity. The ones that are there are receiving the justice of God and we’re going to get into more of that later.

[00:29:59] Diana: [00:30:00] Oh the rapture. Let’s talk about the rapture This is another topic that I have heard on different people’s stories. That the rapture Terrified them. Now for those of you who don’t know what that is. It is a doctrine of Christianity about the end times. That means that Jesus is going to come back In the air, and those of us that are live are going to join him in the clouds, and we’re going to go bodily into heaven with him, and the ones that are not believers in the Lord Jesus Christ, they are going to be left behind.

[00:30:49] Diana: You may have heard of some movies with that title. And as soon as the rapture happens, then [00:31:00] the end of the world comes. We call it the tribulation in the Bible. So the church the saved are in heaven while the tribulation, the judgment of God, is being dished out for the wicked. And I’ll tell you right now that

[00:31:24] Diana: there are a lot of different views on this doctrine of the end times, that’s called eschatology, that’s the big fancy word. And

[00:31:36] Diana: A lot of people don’t believe in the rapture. My husband is one of them.

[00:31:44] Diana: And that’s okay. The end times is very difficult to interpret. There’s a lot of allegorical and imagery and some confusing things in [00:32:00] Revelation and in the other, what we call

[00:32:03] Diana: the prophetic books like Daniel. We can read those and not understand them and maybe have different interpretations. So there are those who do not believe in the rapture at all.

[00:32:18] Diana: They believe that the church is going to go through the tribulation and be in the same boat as everybody else being punished. There are people that believe in the rapture coming after the tribulation.

[00:32:38] Diana: And then you’ve got different views on what we call the millennium, the thousand year reign of Jesus. Jesus will sit on the throne in Jerusalem during the end times. And Satan will be bound, so he can’t do anything. And still you have a [00:33:00] choice, even though Jesus is sitting there, you will still have a choice, am I going to believe, or am I not going to believe in Jesus. Just like we have a choice now, just like the people during Jesus’ first time on the earth had a choice. And there were many people that didn’t believe Jesus.

[00:33:24] Diana: So, don’t want to get too geeky and over your head with all this doctrinal stuff, but the rapture has terrified many people growing up. That if you weren’t saved, that you would be left behind. And, of course, there’s all the jokes that go with it. They would pull jokes on people that put a big pile of clothes somewhere and go hide or something and they’ll think, oh, the rapture came and I was left behind.

[00:33:58] Diana: I would probably be [00:34:00] pretty upset about that kind of treatment. And the rapture was used to beat it over somebody’s head to be good and keep themselves in line. It was always something in the back of their head. This is going to happen any second. And yeah, that is a miserable existence when you’re terrified of, of being left behind.

[00:34:30] Diana: And I don’t think that children should be taught that way. I think it should be

[00:34:36] Diana: we don’t know when Jesus is coming back. We don’t. The Bible states that nobody knows, but the father, God, the father, when is he going to come back? And what his command is, is to be busy doing the Lord’s work, loving your [00:35:00] neighbor, loving your family serving the Lord in whatever capacity you find.

[00:35:06] Diana: But don’t sit around being terrified that, oh the rapture is coming any second now. Wait for the shoe to drop. That’s a miserable existence. I personally believe in the rapture based on my studies. Now, I have gone through Bible college and I’ve had extensive time to study that, but I no longer beat everybody over the head with it.

[00:35:31] Diana: I give people grace within the scope of Christianity that as long as you believe that Jesus is coming back and he’s going to judge the righteous and the evil, it really in the long term, it doesn’t matter, does it? The righteous will be rewarded, the evil will be punished. Jesus is our [00:36:00] hope. That is what we should remember.

[00:36:02] Diana: I don’t sit here and argue with people anymore about what happens in the end times. Because there are those that believe if you believe in the rapture, then you’re stupid. You’re ignorant. You’re going to fall for the Antichrist when he comes into power and you’re going to take the mark of the beast.

[00:36:21] Diana: And yeah, I’m getting back into the geeky doctrinal stuff, but again, we’re going to go back to, if you’re a believer in Jesus, he died on the cross and saved you. From your sin you’re gonna even if the church does go through the tribulation period you’re gonna know Who Jesus is if it’s the Antichrist or Jesus you’re gonna know because the Holy Spirit lives in your heart. He lives inside of you and he will give you the wisdom to discern the [00:37:00] difference, If you are living a godly life, if you are seeking the Lord’s wisdom and direction, so don’t let the rapture be the reason why you don’t want to be a Christian anymore.

[00:37:17] Diana: You don’t want to go to church anymore. You’re just going to throw everything out because that’s not really a major doctrine that you have to worry about. Jesus is our hope, and

[00:37:33] Diana: as long as you are a sincere believer in the Lord, then you have nothing to worry about, okay? You have, you don’t have hell to worry about, and you don’t have being left behind to worry about, okay? Let’s see, what else are we going to talk about?

[00:37:55] Diana: Another reason why people [00:38:00] leave the faith, they just throw the baby out with the bath water, is they’ve been told the wrong…

[00:38:07] Diana: information. They’ve been told lies about salvation. And it depends on which denomination that you were in.

[00:38:17] Diana: Let me give you the bare minimum here of Christianity. Salvation is by faith in Jesus Christ, dying on the cross for your sin. So you could go to heaven with him. Okay, so basics are, You acknowledge you’re a sinner, okay? You don’t dwell on it. You acknowledge that you’re a sinner. You have to admit that. Two.

[00:38:51] Diana: You gotta believe that Jesus is the Son of God, that he came to die on the cross in our place, to take [00:39:00] our sins away, okay? And he rose from the dead. There is a happy ending. He rose from the dead. That is Easter Sunday, folks. He rose again because That’s a picture of us rising again when we go to heaven.

[00:39:23] Diana: This world is not it. We do have an afterlife and we have eternity with Christ. That is the basics of Christianity. Now there are differences to the different denominations. I won’t get into all of them, but there are many denominations that believe in works salvation.

[00:39:48] Diana: I do not believe that the Bible supports that.

[00:39:53] Diana: I grew up Catholic until I was 18. I was told I had to [00:40:00] go to the Catholic Church, even though I was saved at 13 years old. I did make a decision for Christ, I did believe in him for salvation. Catholicism believes in a work salvation. You have to be baptized as a baby, and then you go to confessing your sins to a priest, and then you do confirmation, which is confirming your faith

[00:40:26] Diana: before the bishop, and then you have to go to church every week, you have to pray the rosary, you have to pray to the saints who are dead.

[00:40:39] Diana: But it’s all a works based salvation. You have to do all these things to earn your way to heaven. I do not believe the scriptures support that. Because the Old Testament saints, and we’ve done some studies [00:41:00] here on the podcast of the Old Testament saints, and this was before the law of Moses.

[00:41:05] Diana: This was also after the law of Moses. Again, these people sinned greatly, terribly. And yet they are listed in the hall of faith in Hebrews. It talks about David and Moses and Samson. People in the Bible that they messed up big time, folks. But because they had their faith in the Lord, they trusted in the Lord for their salvation, and it was always faith

[00:41:45] Diana: that saved them, it was never their works, it was never them doing the law. The law of Moses, the Ten Commandments is part of the law.

[00:41:57] Diana: The law was [00:42:00] created to show that we could never perfectly follow the law. It’s impossible. That’s what it was to show us. We need God. We can’t go to heaven without faith in God, trusting in God. Trusting in his sacrifice. Jesus sacrificing himself on the cross in our place.

[00:42:29] Diana: So again, need to read the scriptures to read these wonderful stories of redemption.

[00:42:38] Diana: And I hear these stories from folks, especially on other podcasts, that they had been told by their parents that if they weren’t a virgin anymore, that they were going to go to hell, that they weren’t saved anymore, that their salvation was [00:43:00] dependent on them being a virgin. And all kinds of restrictions were put on them that really were ridiculous.

[00:43:12] Diana: They were worshipping virginity. They didn’t care about their daughter as a person with feelings and emotions and will. No, they worshipped virginity at all costs. Your daughter makes a mistake or maybe she was assaulted. It happens a lot. The boy pushes the girl farther than she ever consented to go, and she’s pregnant, or has a venereal disease, or the guy leaves, she’s left with the mess, and many people are shamed.[00:44:00] [00:44:00] Diana: You know, you’re used duct tape, or what is it, a chipped teacup? That’s ridiculous. Or a wilted rose, some horrible analogy to say that. You made a mistake and God doesn’t love you anymore and you’re nobody’s going to marry you Nobody’s gonna care about you. That’s all bunk, is bunk. I understand why

[00:44:33] Diana: After that experience that you don’t want anything to do with God, but it’s not God doing that

[00:44:41] Diana: because there’s Lots of women in the Bible. They got second chances. We’ve done a study on the woman at the well, she became one of Jesus evangelists. We have the woman caught in adultery. She was forgiven.

[00:44:59] Diana: [00:45:00] You have rehab a prostitute in the city of Jericho. She was helping the three spies by hiding them. She is a descendant of Jesus. She’s in his genealogy. And there’s plenty of examples if you’re looking for them. But salvation, folks, is by grace. Grace means unmerited favor. You have to give yourself grace. Don’t ever let anybody tell you that God is done with you because that’s not true.

[00:45:38] Diana: I don’t care what you’ve done. There’s nothing that can separate us from the love of God.

[00:45:44] Diana: That is Bible there. No principalities, no powers, there’s nothing that can separate us from the love of God.

[00:45:53] Diana: It’s not about virginity or purity.

[00:45:58] Diana: Let’s see. There’s a lot on this list that I [00:46:00] came up with. Let’s talk about LGBT issues. And I don’t normally talk about controversial stuff because… It’s controversial and I don’t like to hate male.

[00:46:14] Diana: I don’t want to be a Christian or have anything to do with the church because they are mean to LGBT community. Or I’m gay or lesbian and the church has rejected me. So I don’t want anything to do with God. God hates me.

[00:46:38] Diana: So I’m going to say this.

[00:46:41] Diana: The church seems to like to have their favorite pet sins. We go back to, we are all sinners, okay? We are all born with a sin nature. That means we [00:47:00] have a tendency to gravitate towards certain things. Our favorite things, our favorite sins. The church is very guilty of taking the LGBT community and making this the unpardonable sin.

[00:47:19] Diana: That God doesn’t love them anymore because they identify as gay or lesbian, or what they call queer,

[00:47:28] Diana: but we are all sinners and to point a finger at somebody else’s sin is wrong.

[00:47:38] Diana: I’m too busy worrying about my own sin to be pointing fingers at everybody else. And so the big hot topic right now is the LGBT community and the transgender community. But no, God doesn’t hate fags. [00:48:00] That’s something horrible I hear all the time. And whether you believe that homosexuality is a sin, or whether you believe somebody was born that way, it doesn’t change the fact that They are children of God, created in God’s image, and they are deserving of love and respect.

[00:48:27] Diana: And they are also worthy of a chance to hear the gospel, the real gospel, not the fake gospel that makes you do all this stuff to earn your salvation. The real gospel that despite of ourselves, God still loves and cares for us. And wants us to be with him in eternity.

[00:48:51] Diana: So I think that it’s wrong for us to treat the gay community, LGBT [00:49:00] community, as lepers or, you know, they got the plague or something, that they can’t come to church. That you have to beat them over the head and scream at them these Bible verses or these proof texts about sodomy. But that isn’t kind, it isn’t kind.

[00:49:28] Diana: And we’ve done studies on Sodom and Gomorrah. Everybody says, Oh they were destroyed because of sodomy. And I’ve said this before, I believe that Sodom and other communities that were destroyed in the same manner, they had multiple sins going on.

[00:49:48] Diana: I’m not going to necessarily believe it’s one sin. That doesn’t follow logic. They had a lot of sin going on. They were doing [00:50:00] horrible things. Probably idolatry, probably murder, incest, rape. They were doing all kinds of things. I really don’t believe that

[00:50:13] Diana: God’s going to destroy a city for one particular sin. That doesn’t go with the whole of scripture. But regardless, LGBT community need Christ, just like we need Christ. And regardless of what sin we have, name it, we all need to depend on the Lord. And once we get saved, once we’re a believer in Christ and we’re starting to seek him

[00:50:45] Diana: For direction and getting to know God more fully Becoming more like Jesus. He will tell you what to change in your life, [00:51:00] If we’re listening, he will tell you to stop cheating on your taxes. He will stop you from cheating on your spouse. He will stop you from Stealing from your employer.

[00:51:17] Diana: He will tell You need to change this. You have anger issues. You need to get some help for that. Or you’re you drink too much and it’s affecting your family. It’s affecting your life. You need to get help for that. The Holy Spirit that lives inside of us is the one that convicts us and tells us what we need to change and tells us how to do that and gives us strength to do that.

[00:51:49] Diana: And the same thing with the transgender community. Now, I have co workers that transitioned completely [00:52:00] at work, and work paid for it. And I have developed relationships with these people. And they’re wonderful workers, they’re hard working people, they’re a delight to be around, they’re kind, they’re generous.

[00:52:17] Diana: But they are making a choice. It may not be the choice that we believe is right,

[00:52:24] Diana: but as far as transgendering is concerned, and God knows who they are inside. The essence of their being is inside. Whether you believe that, okay, they were born a woman in a man’s body or vice versa, God knows who they are. God knows this is a child of God, a creation of mine, someone that I love and care for.

[00:52:56] Diana: And I want them [00:53:00] to have salvation also. Salvation is not based on whether you’re male or female. Salvation is based on your faith and trust in the Lord. And I know some of you are probably screaming at me, screaming at your, phone.

[00:53:21] Diana: But

[00:53:22] Diana: we need to develop relationships with people to share the good news, not beat them over the head with, if you decide to go get gender reassignment surgery, then you’re not valuable anymore. You’re not able to know Jesus as your savior. You’re not worthy of salvation. That’s absurd. That is not who Jesus is.

[00:53:49] Diana: Now, is that God’s best for somebody to surgically alter themselves because They believe there are different sex. [00:54:00] I don’t think that’s God’s best. I don’t know all the answers I’m being honest here. I don’t really know enough of the facts about the matter in surgeries and stuff to make a definitive stand. My First impression would be

[00:54:24] Diana: I’m going to refrain from doing anything permanent until I’m an adult and my body has finished growing. And That’s my opinion.

[00:54:38] Diana: But you know if I had a child that believed that they were a different sex than what they were born with. I Would still love them. I would still want to support them I don’t want them to be bullied. And that’s what the church has been doing is the church bullies [00:55:00] people The church is not loving in Christ like I get that.

[00:55:05] Diana: But there are churches out there that aren’t Bullies, that will welcome you, It will welcome you and support you in following Christ. And we’re all in a different journey. First thing you learn, when you follow, when you get saved, the first thing you learn is reading the Bible, prayer.

[00:55:37] Diana: Listening to the Lord for his direction, finding other friends, some people that are also Christians that are on this journey and to support you along the way. And we all are struggling in our journey, whatever it is, it might not be [00:56:00] lGBT issues or transgender issues, but we’re all struggling with something. And then we don’t have a right to judge our fellow Christians on this journey.

[00:56:15] Diana: We don’t. Know if I see somebody going down a really bad path, I can reach out. If I have a relationship with somebody, I can reach out and say, Hey, you know, I really care about you. I want to help you, whatever you’re struggling with and how can I help. I’m concerned about the path that you’re taking.

[00:56:42] Diana: We need support. Should we go and kick them out of the church and tell them never to come back? No, that’s not what Jesus would do. Would he say, okay, go and sin no more?

[00:56:56] Diana: Correct. God would give you the [00:57:00] power to go and live and sin no more. Or if you sin, then you come to me and we’ll talk about it. I’ll forgive you and you’ll go on to live a victorious life.

[00:57:17] Diana: So if you’re an LGBT person listening, I thank you for listening. And if you have a story you want to tell on the show contact me,

[00:57:31] Diana: but I don’t think that we should be hating anybody.

[00:57:39] Diana: Christians are to love, we’re not to hate others.

[00:57:44] Diana: And I’m not going to get into the rest of the arguments for and against

[00:57:51] Diana: LGBT issues. That isn’t what kind of a podcast that I have, but I did want to address this [00:58:00] as one of the reasons that people abandon their faith is because the church has kicked them out. Their parents have kicked them out of their home. And they’re told that God hates them, and that isn’t true.

[00:58:13] Diana: I did have a guest on my show, Dr. Reverend Marsha Ledford, and we talked about some of these issues. So go back on on my website, you can see every single podcast that I have done. I think she was on my first season, and we talked about that. But I know

[00:58:38] Diana: people that love Jesus and want to follow God and they identify as LGBT or transgender. And it isn’t really my right to say because you’re gay or because you’re transgender that you’re not saved. That’s wrong.[00:59:00] And there are churches that will support you as a person.

[00:59:07] Diana: Treat you like a human being instead of somebody with a disease.

[00:59:13] Diana: I believe that we can be a follower of Christ and be gay or transgender because if you look at the lives of the people at church or other Christians and you examine our lives, you can find something that’s pretty appauling and you could say to me, Diana, I didn’t know that you do this and such or you did this and you should be ashamed of yourself. There’s no hope for you and you’re not going to heaven because you did fill in the blank.

[00:59:54] Diana: I do not believe that’s how Jesus is. [01:00:00] So I’ve talked about that way too long.

[01:00:02] Diana: We’re gonna do this in a two parter series

[01:00:05] Diana: I’ve already talked for an hour and so much more to talk about So, join me next week as we do part two of deconstruction. Some more encouragement for you.

[01:00:25] Diana: We’re gonna unpack this and the reasons why people leave their faith after trauma or abuse. So, join with me next week and I promise we will get through these difficult concepts together and with truth and honesty. So God bless you guys, we’ll see you next week, bye for now.

[01:00:54] [01:01:00] [01:01:22] Diana: